Mumbai Salsa

Its predictable, a bit B-grade in terms of execution (slickness, overall performances etc) but has a fun first half and some truly naughty one-liners. Its definitely an adult oriented theme – about eight people, four of each sex, each with their own philosophies, values, personalities and their quest for love / companionship.

It’s definitely a multiplex movie – it is about and caters to a very upmarket audience. Most of the jokes are about relationships, sex and yet more sex. The characters are the type who have high paying corporate jobs, believe in living for weekends, partying hard, having one night stands (or ‘sits’), lots of alcohol (beer, cocktails and red wine all feature prominently) and generally living the good life.

There are some genuinely nice one-liners, some characters (particularly Maya’s) were nicely sketched and there are some nice warm moments. However, nowhere does it go beyond nice – it kind of remains at that level throughout and the predictability of the end robs the movie of much of its steam. Also the pace of the movie and the performances are both a bit uneven, you feel it stretch out a little and while it’s a decent watch, you’re not all that disappointed when it ends.

Manjari Fadnis and Vir Das as the ‘lead couple’ both turn in decent performances, I thought Neelam Chauhan as Xenobia was the weakest in terms of acting ability, the music was ok…everything is ok. I think the film would’ve benefited from more sharply defined characters – some more meat behind the broad sketches they drew of each of the eight people. All of them end up being too goody-goody, doing the right thing which I guess is what makes everything so predictable…

It needed a little bit of madness…continuing on the cocktail analogy of the previous review, while it was tasty, this drink was a little weak – it lacked a little alcohol, lacked some punch or a secret ingredient which gave it some zing. It went down smoothly but you never really felt it and when it was over, you didn’t grieve that it was over. Probably not a drink that you would order in a second round…

Bhool Bhulaiyaa

This one’s kind of unique – a horror comedy. I take back all that I said about Priyadarshan’s formulaic comedies. This ones good…actually better than good…and so what if it’s a remake of a Malayalam movie Manichithrathazhu

Akshay rocks ! He’s becoming better with every movie with his trademark deadpan delivery and excellent timing. However, this movie is not just about him as everyone deliver great performances.

The plot isn’t all that bad either – it has a few holes and is definitely not completely logically coherent. But it works. In a small village in India, a young man (Shiney Ahuja) and his newly wed wife (Vidya Balan) return from America and decide to live in their supposedly haunted haveli (palace) as they don’t believe in spooks and such stuff. Their whole family (chacha, phupha and their kids etc) are based in the same village and completely against this idea. Soon there are some strange going-ons, and against the explicit advice of the elders, Vidya Balan opens the forbidden door, beyond which the ghost(s) are locked away. Now there is a quantum leap in the strange going-ons and the whole family decides to move into the house as Shiney/Vidya still refuse to move out. Then various people are called in to help sort this out, including Akshay Kumar who is a psychiatrist and a close friend of Shiney’s from America.

The first half focuses more on the comedy angle – the fear setting in, the strange happenings and even more fear. Akshay enters after around a third of the movie and the comedy factor goes up a couple of notches – he’s an unusual psychiatrist, a bit of a kook himself. Then, kind of midway through the second half, the story becomes a bit serious – we begin to understand what is happening, why etc. I would not recommend watching this part with kids as it can be unnerving for them.

Vidya Balan and Manoj Joshi (as the head of Shiney’s family) were very good in their roles, truly good performances. The rest were good – I don’t think there was anyone who was a weak link. But the true star is unmistakably Akshay - the cheers from the audience, the applause as soon as he enters are fun to watch - its been a long time since a star had that much impact. The songs were quite ordinary except for Mere Dholna (very nicely performed) and the awesome title track, which comes right at the end, along with the credits but plays in the background through the film.

It’s a really nice cocktail, this movie – a heady mix of horror, comedy and pure zani-ness which refreshes, cheers you up and gives a little ‘high’. When you walk out of the hall you’re rocking to the sounds of the title track and smiling. Cant ask for much more from either a cocktail or a movie…

No Smoking

The first fifteen minutes are brilliant but are followed by a descent into hell – full of the most pretentious, senseless, pseudo- psychoanalytic ‘Freudian’ imagery ever to grace Indian cinema.

The start is very promising. John Abraham as K, is a die-hard smoker (pun intended), with his wife (Ayesha Takia) amongst several people trying to make him quit. He has a group of friends as well, who share his passion and their conversation is hilarious in terms of how they defend their habit. The beginning is full of extremely stylized Italian chic imagery – the suits, the look, the sunglasses, the home décor - all looking like they’re straight out of a Martini / LV ad. The dialogue is also extremely witty – a sample
(Phone conversation)
‘You’re leaving me ?’
‘I’ve already left you’
‘How can you leave me ? nobody leaves me ?!’
(Pause) ‘I am nobody…that’s why I left you…’

However, as K joins a Quit Smoking program called ‘Kalkatta Karpets’, the movie literally and figuratively begins to spiral downwards. What follows is weird, senseless, unnerving and even gory in parts. There is hardly any redeeming feature of this section (apart from the stylization and some small touches of humour- we find out K's elder brother is named 'J', for example). The end comes as such a relief that it receives a standing ovation for the wrong reasons (from the film makers point of view). I’m shocked and saddened that the combined formidable writing & directorial talents of Vishal Bhardwaj (Omkara) and Anurag Kashyap (writer of Water, Yuva, Satya, director of Black Friday and this film) led to this indisputable turkey.

This one gives RGV’s Aag a run for its money…another case of ‘Oh, what could’ve been !’ To use one of the favourite lines of my parents ‘Na sir, na pair’ (literally means ‘no hands or feet’, figuratively ‘neither head nor tail’). Both meanings fit perfectly.

Jab We Met

It’s a slightly implausible rom-com (romantic comedy) which has a few very good moments, is light and easy to watch, doesn’t tax the brain too much and is good clean fun (has no vulgarity, slapstick or violence). However, this is balanced by no real depth to the story or characters, an uneven pace, some uneven acting and too many stereotypes….

Shahid Kapoor is the rich son of a big Mumbai industrialist who is going through a crisis, the specifics of the crisis are explained only later in the movie, but its clear that he’s completely shaken up. So much so that, kind of in a trance, he abandons his car, his mobile phones etc, and walks aimlessly before ending up in a Mumbai to Delhi train where he sits, probably looking for some peace and quiet. Unfortunately, he is joined by an extremely talkative, Punjabi, bubbling Kareena Kapoor – who ensures that within a few minutes Shahid is privy to all her life details (she’s going back to Bhatinda, intends to run away to get married, hates Mumbai, loves to talk etc).

Soon, after a series of events, they’ve missed the train and are stranded at Ratlam station, Kareena is moniless hysterical, and since she is very clear that all this is Shahid’s fault, it is equally clear that he is responsible now to get her home to Bhatinda. And it doesn’t matter what Shahid thinks (he’s obviously reluctant about the whole thing). He has to drop her or she’ll beat him to pulp…After the mandatory song and dance they reach Bhatinda and what happens next is basically the focus of the remaining 75% of the movie which contains more item numbers, wedding songs and dances, romantic confusion and a reasonably predictable ending.

There are some very nice moments – Kareena’s ‘I’m a karate brown belt’ or 'aap convince ho gaye hain ya main aur bolun ?' (are you convinced or should I talk some more ?) or ‘tainu ki fark painda hai’ (what difference does it make to you) logic when it comes to running away from home, Shahid’s change of attitude when he goes back to work, the whole conversation about running away to get married as a foursome and finally the check-in in Hotel Decent – all stand out in memory. Kareena varies from being very good to ordinary both in terms of acting and looks, the vivacity and feistiness comes through but not consistently, in some cases almost looking like stupidity. Her Punjabi Bhatinda family is stereotypically Punjabi – loud, garishly dressed, over the top and willing to break into Bhangra steps at the click of a finger. Shahid is very good, though a bit predictable. There is also this unintentionally hilarious train / car sequence which is filmed with blatantly obvious model trains / cars which look like they're made of plasticine – a clear case of cost cutting I think…

This is thankfully not one of the new breed of formulaic comedies, a la Priyadarshan, which usually involve a lot of young guys chasing a lot of skimpily clad young girls. There’s more to it than just that – unfortunately though, not a whole lot more. Good for one viewing, if you’ve nothing better to do but avoid advance booking the DVD.

Laaga Chunari Main Daag

Funny how something as mercenary as prostitution, always manages to arouse a variety of emotions, especially when it’s the subject of a movie. This is an ok film – its lifted up by certain performances and authentic characterizations but let down by a certain brooding weightiness (thanks to its topic), a plot that becomes increasingly filmy, ‘sobby’ and ends a bit unrealistically, almost with a whimper as none of the expected fireworks materialize.

‘Laaga’ tells the tale of a simple XIIth pass village girl (Rani Mukherjee) who leaves her family in Benares and goes to Mumbai to earn a living due to monetary pressures. When she can’t get a job and the pressure from home to send a money order increases, Rani has to make some choices – to sleep with a guy who promises her a job in return or to return home. The movie then details the repercussions of her choice, including the impact on her parents (Anupam Kher and Jaya Bachchan) and her sister (Konkona Sen).

The Benares part of Rani’s / Konkona’s life was very realistic – each member of the family was well-sketched out. Anupam Kher is a retired professor, clearly a mis-fit in today’s commercial world, a crabby recluse who hates that everything is about money yet flowers when the money orders from Mumbai begin to arrive. Jaya is a behenji home-maker but wears the pants in the family, takes care of the house, the money and sews petticoats to make up for the shortfalls.

Rani is pretty much what you would expect – very good if you’re a fan and ordinary if you’re not. I’m tending more towards the latter camp. I feel she is doing too many similar ‘weepy’ roles and is in danger of becoming typecast. She transitions easily from the village girl to the cosmopolitan mumbaikar, cries a lot, broods a lot but does all of this without any real spark or brilliance.

All the sparks, the bubbliness and energy comes from Konkona who, for me, was the life of the film. Her character, as the tomboyish younger sister, introduced some much needed vibrancy and lighter moments in the film. She studies and joins an advertising agency in Mumbai, blissfully unaware of the choices her sister has made. It doesn’t take her long to make her mark in the firm she works in – and her stint in the ad agency provide some of the more interesting moments in the film.

The music is decent – there are a couple of songs I want to listen to again – including one picturised on Rani as she is making up her mind on which road to travel. I did not like the message though that this movie is sending out, that its easy to achieve success as a high class working girl. For every one girl who achieves her materialistic ambitions, there will probably be thousand failures who rot in the seedy by-lanes of Mumbai or in police lock-ups. I also think there was a gross over simplification of the route to becoming a call-girl and there is a danger that it spawns a few imitations.

This is becoming a rare genre – the emotional family tear-jerker – there was a time when Hindi cinema abounded in such films but now they are mercifully far and few in between. Life is too short to spend weeping or watching others weep.

Johnny Gaddar

It’s a rarely witnessed category in India, the film noir. Even rarer is something like Johnny Gaddar, a well made one (‘Red’ springs to mind as a recent terrible example) though Hollywood is full of good ones ( like Maltese Falcon, Body Heat or even LA Confidential). The genre is a tribute to James Hadley Chase and some old Hindi movies like Parwana, both of which flash across the screen frequently as the obvious inspirations behind the plot.

The plot, like all movies in the genre, is too complicated to elaborate but has enough twists and turns to keep you engrossed till the last frame. There are tough cops, no good guys but good guys who are actually bad and bad guys who are actually good and the inevitable sensual babe. There is money, greed and a tangled love affair. Basically there is a gang of 5 criminals, there is a huge deal happening and then there is a double cross. All of this happens in the first 20 minutes or so. The rest of the movie revolves around whether the other gang members catch him or not.

I thought Zakhir Hussain, Vinay Pathak were excellent as two of the gang members as was Govind Namdeo as a very tough, finger chopping, wisecracking cop (‘in my life only duty, no beauty’ is his memorable response when asked if he’s married). Neil Mukesh is good, shows potential, Dharmendra is decent but is it my imagination that he seems to be slurring his every dialogue, as if he’s still high on his Bagpiper whiskey commercials. Rimi Sen and Ashiwni Kaslekar are very good as well, everyone fits their part and does justice to their roles, the movie is compact, slick and well edited. The music is decent and the only other thing that could be improved is the ending – it’s a bit incomplete and hence leaves you a bit unfulfilled. Also, there is a little bit of unnecessary gore.

Its unlikely to ever be nominated for an Oscar (after Eklavya’s nomination though would hesitate to say impossible) but is definitely worth the price of a ticket and succeeds in keeping you on the edge of your seats. Its fast, racy and provides cheap thrills – and wasn’t that what a James Hadley Chase was about ?

Lets Talk (2002)

Radhika is having an affair and is pregnant from her lover. She now wants to tell her husband of ten years, Nikhil, about it and starts thinking about how he will react, playing out different scenarios in her mind.

That’s it, that’s the whole movie.

I think there were 6 different scenario’s played out and its amazing how much you can learn about a couple from just their conversations on this topic. The only other actor we see is Radhika’s friend – else its just Radhika and Nikhil. The movie is a very true depiction of middle class India. Everything, right from the language and expressions, the décor, the clothes and even the camera and lighting (it was shot digitally to ensure there were minimal set-up times and interference with the actors), enhance its realism.

Boman Irani as Nikhil is brilliant – it’s a very difficult task to play the same character in 6 different ways but he rises to the occasion (in one scenario almost literally). Maia Khatrak is very good as Radhika – stuck in an impossible dilemma between a rock and a hard place – she has to make a difficult choice and soon. The marriage itself is like most marriages – has lost some of its spark and sheen and is now almost boring and is probably the reason behind her going astray.

The topic is extremely provocative as you can imagine and sparks many conversations at home while you watch it. You’re forced to take sides, identify with some of the characterizations, disagree with some of the statements. There are moments when you squirm uncomfortably and others where you smile.

Its good stuff, original, courageous (especially since it’s the debut film of the director and most of its crew) and imaginative. Great stuff, hats off to the cast and crew.

Mumbai Express (2005)

Delightful timepass. Not likely to enter any top 10 list but a great way to spend a couple of hours with a good non-slapstick, non-vulgar comedy.

Three small time crooks plan to kidnap a land grabbing businessman’s son for ransom. However, everything that can go wrong does and soon they have to hunt for a replacement. Enter Avinash, a motorcyclist who is also affectionately known as ‘Mumbai Express’, who rides in the ‘Well of Death’. He is roped in to join their gang against his desire to do anything illegal. What then happens is pure mayhem and we get one interesting situation and character after another including a corrupt cop, his mistress, their illegal son, the businessman and a horse with a craving to eat any paper / anything that comes in its vicinity.

Vijay Raaz is outstanding as Digamber, one of the would-be kidnappers. He has truly been wasted in most his recent slapstick roles after great performances in this and as Dubeyji in Monsoon Wedding. Kamal Hasan is very good but doesn’t sparkle.

It’s a movie which leaves you with a nice warm feeling. There are some excellent comic touches, dialogues. However, this is a good movie which somehow doesn’t reach the dizzying heights of greatness. I think it does as much justice to the plot / script as is possible but it’s a movie which can make you smile without really making you laugh aloud.

Its something different, though, it does have an endearing charm to it, an impishness and innocence that is refreshing. Definitely worth a look-see.

Nanhe Jaisalmer

It’s a little bit of a fairytale, a little bit ‘preachy’ but beautifully made, supported by great acting and some well-sketched characters and so connects with the audience very easily.

Nanhe Jaisalmer is the story of a ten year old boy, the primary bread winner of his family, who cannot read or write but can converse with tourists in four languages. When he was four, Bobby Deol, the film star, had picked him up during a shoot and called him his friend. So Nanhe calls Bobby his ‘dost’ (friend), has a room full of his posters, watches his every film and writes countless letters to him. Suddenly, there is news that Bobby’s latest film is going to be shot in Jaisalmer…and Nanhe just knows that he will come and meet him. Does he ? Watch and you’ll find out.

There are some interesting sub-plots regarding his sister’s wedding and also about the ‘Madamji’ who forces all the elders / young to attend night school to become literate. What lifts the movie though are the rustic touches – the simplicity of the lives of the different characters shown – the paan wala who reads the newspaper to Nanhe, the drunk who asks Nanhe to shield him during night class whenever he wants to take a swig, the bespectacled folk singer, the shop owner etc. Dwij Yadav is great as Nanhe – his dimples and enthusiasm are contagious. And the mom and sister also act beautifully.

Only disappointments were the music (I thought it was ordinary), a slightly prolonged and unnecessary opening sequence and a little, just a little heavy handed preaching during the movie. It was a bit like Aesop’s Fables with a moral after most sequences in the second half.

However, its nice, good, clean fun. Even if life in small towns is no longer really as simple or nice as depicted, it’s a lovely portrait of how we would like it to be. Definitely worth a watch, with or without the kids.

Dhamaal

Its juvenile, descends into brainless slapstick often but still manages to make you laugh, that too very loudly and almost uncontrollably in a few places. A good example of a good timepass movie.

Four friends are told about Rs10 crores being buried in a location in Goa. They are forced to tell a cop on their tail about it as well. After a few unsuccessful attempts to settle who gets how much, they decide its every man for himself and each chooses their own zany way to get to Goa first. The ending is somewhat senti / mushy but the rest of the movie does not deviate in its steadfast reolve to make the audience laugh.

In the process you get quite a few PJ’s (the blank 'horse & grass painting' springs to mind), a few decent ones and a few great ones (the ‘Sholay’ rip-off, the whole aircraft scene, especially the bit with the aircraft controller were memorable). The acting was decent (Aashish Choudhary, one of the four, overacts too much though and Arshad Warsi looks disinterested overall), the music was standard (2-3 item numbers where people dressed in cool clothes in cool clubs, make cool gestures while surrounded by hot babes in skimpy outfits….you get the picture ?).

The one jarring note for me was Javed Jaafri’s character, who is shown to be the dumb one amongst the four friends, is also shown to be someone who lisps. From a plot point of view, there was absolutely no need for him to be lisping and it irritates me when people associate physical disability with something like stupidity just to raise a few cheap laughs – he could have been speaking normally and in fact I think the movie would have been better off for it

We went, we saw, we had a good time. Nothing more, nothing less.

Aag (the review)

Ridiculous, pathetic, terrible. Add over-hyped, shoddy and poorly written and you begin to get an idea of how bad it was. All the points made in my preview hold true and then some. This is a new genre – unintentional comedy leading to unintended horror amongst the audience.

It sucks big time as a movie

• Camera angles : RGV (Ram Gopal Verma, the director), delights in weird camera angles that only enhance the feeling of nausea and detract completely from the characters / movie.
• Bad Acting : Nisha Kothari is the worst of the lot – cant act, cant talk, cant emote. I hope for her sake she has a good figure and is willing to bare all as that is her only hope for making it big in Bollywood. Prashant runs her close in terms of overall badness and everyone else compete for 3rd place.
• MohanLal as Narsimha : his southern accent jars and makes you laugh. The man can act, but is wasted. I kept thinking there may be a twist, which justifies him being from South India but no such thing.
• Completely disjointed, undeveloped / rushed story : we don’t understand what the movie is about – since it shifts to the Mumbai underworld. If it weren’t for the orginal Sholay, like most of the actors, I would have been groping in the dark. We don’t feel for any of the characters here since they are woefully undeveloped.

Vs the original Sholay (maybe I shouldn’t even honor this tripe with a comparison to Sholay, but I cant resist, I love the original too much)

• The relationship between Amitabh / Dharmendra : One of the highlights of the original was the chemistry between the two – how two characters so different to each other got along and functioned beautifully as a team. Amitabh, as the strong silent type paired with the ebullient, emotional, extrovert Dharmendra. Here, there is no difference between the two – they are the same, both ambling aimless idiots vs the men of steel they were trying to emulate. As if to rub salt in the wound, they even become police informers in the beginning.
• The senti / mushy, romantic ‘I love you’ crap : Neither with Dharmendra nor Amitabh along with their leading ladies, was there any romance. Their characters were too macho to allow any of this shit. Here you have both their replacements getting into ‘I love you’. ‘No. Really, I really love you’ stuff.
• Prashant is, looks & acts half Sushmita’s age !! This pairing doesn’t work, is a non-starter, while the Amitabh-Jaya pairing was one of the most touching things in Sholay.
• Of psychotic vs menacing villains : I don’t think, with all due respect to Pran, there has been a more intimidating villain than Gabbar Singh in Sholay. And amazingly it is done without any hint of gore, over the top violence. Here Babban comes across as a stark, raving bonkers – he is sinister, creepy and sleazy. Little touches like the slithering tongue or the ‘poof’ further confirm RGV’s colossal errors of judgement in the movie.

I don’t know what forced him to remake Sholay without any fresh ideas – the darkness (as communicated in the preview) is all pervasive, gets to you. I think I’m going to not watch any more RGV movies as he’s completely lost it. Cant think of a worse way to have spent Sunday afternoon. I want my money back !

Aag (the preview)

I haven’t seen Aag yet, will be doing so tomorrow. And I assume everyone who’s reading this has seen Sholay or at least knows the story.

I’m one of the biggest fans of Sholay- not the biggest, I know a couple of people who’re crazier about it – but crazy enough to stop channel surfing if I see it somewhere on TV despite having seen it 50+ times

I’m also not one of those who think it shouldn’t be remade – I think a fresh interpretation can always be interesting, and Don is a good example of how a classic could still be re-invigorated.

However, having seen the trailers / promo’s, I feel there are some fundamental errors RamGopal Verma has made. I will of course, confirm this once I see it tomorrow but here goes

1.The Cast : Why would you choose newcomers to play arguably amongst the meatiest / most high profile roles in Hindi cinema ? Compare the talent on offer in Sholay, which starred already established, great actors like Amitabh, Dharmendra, Jaya, Hema, Asrani etc vs Ajay Devgan, Nisha Kothari, Prashant who ?
2. The characters : The true beauty of Sholay was that every character was unique and made their mark – whether they appeared for 5 minutes or 50, they were all unforgettable. Surma Bhopali, the Angrezon ke zamaney ka jailor, the old servant in thakur’s house, AK Hangal in the village, Kaalia / Samba, Jaya’s character…I can go on and I haven’t even mentioned the main stars yet…they were all endearing, appealing and made an indelible mark in our memory. Based on the trailors, the sheer commercial nature of the project as evinced by the hype & PR around it, I feel Aag is going to focus only on the main actors and make caricatures / a mockery of the others. For me, this would rob the movie of its soul.
3. The music : not a patch on the earlier soundtrack, no further comment needed
4. The darkness : Every promo / poster I’ve seen of this one is very dark, very indoors. One of the amazing things about Sholay was that it showed menace and intimidation amongst bright, sunny, and very picturesque settings.
5. Regionalism : Just based on how the guys talk etc, I feel he has made the characters very tapori / mumbaiya, rather than kept it free of regional bias as in the original – Sholay / Ramgad could have been anywhere – Maharashtra / MP / UP…

If it truly suffers from the above flaws (and I will know for sure by tomorrow afternoon), then RGV has copied a classic without understanding what made the orginial tick in the first place !

Heyy Baby

This is a movie which does a decent job of combining good comedy with `heart-rending’ emotional drama. Taking my kids as a barometer, there were moments when they were shrieking with laughter, doing serious damage to their seats by jumping up and down with delight. And others when they were crying, literally, with tears streaming down their cheeks, upset at some of the things happening to the baby.

Three Casanovas, Ritiesh Deshmukh, Akshay Kumar and Fardeen Khan, are fast friends and flatmates. Their free-wheeling lifestyle comes to a shuddering halt when a baby is left outside their house one fine morning, with a cryptic note asking them to take care of their offspring. For the next half haour we’re treated to classic ‘Three Men and a Baby’ stuff, as they struggle to cope (as most new parents do) with a creature that sleeps, eats, pooh’s and repeats the cycle until infuriation sets in. Then something happens (and I hesitate to say more for fear of giving the story away), they fall in love with the baby and reform their life to take care of the baby but then mom comes in to reclaim the baby (all this is the emotional phase of the movie) and finally, the rest of the movie revolves on how they try to win the baby (and mom) back.

The comic scenes are very good – a little slapstick (and over the top stuff) is combined with great situations and comic timing to allow plenty of laughter from the audience. It actually gets better in the second half, when they’re trying to win the baby back, and there are a couple of surprises to ensure our interest is held throughout.

The emotional stuff – I felt they should have toned it down a bit (maybe even eliminated it altogether) – there were some disturbing scenes involving the baby, which I felt were inappropriate for a family movie (with young kids present in the hall). My kids were really upset when they happened, and although they left the hall in smiles at the end, I didn’t enjoy watching them get worked up. BTW, don’t miss the beginning or the end, the opening song sequence has the most starlets I’ve ever seen in a movie and the credits are good fun.

Akshay Kumar was outstanding – his timing has always been excellent and he manages to do it with a deadpan expression that provokes laughter. In my opinion, he is a true superstar who can handle any genre (action, comedy, drama) and has much better acting skills than some ahead of him in the box-office/publicity pecking order. Fardeen was very good as well, he has really improved in recent times. I think Ritiesh always overacts and this movie didn’t help change my opinion. Vidya Balan was ok, I felt she wasn’t the right choice for her role, while Boman Irani was his usual impressive self.

This is a good example of a good time pass movie – doesn’t stretch the mind too much, has a few slapstick / mind-less moments to prevent it from being a classic, a little emotion, some good songs and a lot of fun. Its like a karela wrapped in sugar coating. Or vice versa. Can taste surprisingly good but unlikely to become a regular / anyone's favourite…

Ratatouille

How do they do it ? How do the guys at Pixar keep coming up with concepts like this, creating endearing stories where you could swear none exist ? I mean this is about a rat which can cook and quite amazingly becomes the inspiration behind a famous French restaurant. Yet we cheer the rat all the way through, we root for the restaurant itself (which is being ruined by an ‘evil’ chef) and we feel for the other characters in the kitchen. And this is accompanied as usual by the most beautiful animation / special effects.
On the con side, there are no rolling-on-the-floor-laughing moments, its not a classic which will bear repeated viewings (or in the case of my kids several, multiple repeated viewings) like Jungle Book / Finding Nemo etc.

However, it’s a great day out for all those who are young at heart…

Budha Mar Gaya

The first time I walked out of a movie in a long time – and boy, did this movie deserve it ! Decent idea (rich man dies, however family has to pretend he is alive for a few days else they would become bankrupt) and decent cast (Anupam Kher, Paresh Rawal, Ranvir Shourie), totally & utterly ruined by the crassest execution possible – full of sexual innuendo, crude jokes, the worst kind of slapstick possible – and all done at the highest decibel level possible. All the cast possibly descend to the worst levels imaginable and if they have any shame / pride, they will cringe when they see themselves on screen.

Easily the worst movie I’ve seen in the last year with not a single redeeming feature…

Chak De India

This is not a sophisticated film – its simple yet rousingly entertaining. It unabashedly cashes in in the wave of patriotism sweeping through the country, a sort of pride where we are increasingly comfortable with who / what we are rather than just blindly ape-ing the west. The movie brings you to your feet in quite a few places – but only if you’re the type who enjoys watching India win in sport, the type who can take off your shirt to celebrate a la Saurav / Freddie etc.

What makes this movie different is that it weaves its story around a rather unlikely vehicle, womens hockey, and there is more to this movie than just sport. There is a story in there about the shallowness of our tv media, its insatiable appetite for concocting news, while adhering to the worst standards of yellow journalism. There is another about the pathetic nature of the officialdom, the politicians and bureaucrats who run our sports. Yet another about the soft nature of our sportsmen, their limited ambition where they are content to become something in India rather than internationally, their inability to focus on fitness or slog it out and even their desire to be treated as superstars, whether worthy of the status or not. And, finally, it is about women – do they belong exclusively in the kitchen or is there a world beyond that ? Shouldnt they get the same attention / money / sponsorship as their more feted male counterparts ?


Shahrukh is a disgraced men’s hockey player who returns after a 7 year self-imposed exile to coach the Indian women’s hockey team. A team which is so faction ridden, that even the hockey association has no faith in them and brand them absolute no-hopers. The team itself is composed of clearly defined, stereo-typical characters, some fighting their own personal battles, whether with their parents, their in-laws or even their husbands / fiancee’s and others just there for the ride. How he gets them to become one team is the focus of the first half. The second is about what they try to achieve.

In what I think is more a commercial decision than a creative one, it’s the north Indian, hindi speaking characters who get most of the meaty parts. However, all the characters act out of their skin, matching Shahrukh every step of the way. SRK himself is refreshingly understated, saving the histrionics for only the beginning and the end. The only song is the chest thumping, energetic Chak de India, used throughout as the background music.

Its tough to really criticize this film as, despite a few logical flaws, it achieves what it promises. I liked the way the movie focused on a few of the hockey players, rather than all 16. Better to get to know a few well rather than all marginally. I liked the way most of the hockey sequences were handled and the editing of the entire film– the action and drama was gripping and you didn’t want to miss a second. I loved the way they played shamelessly to the audience, getting the desired response – for example there is a scene where SRK is shown watching someone pull up the Indian flags at a championship. When asked what he is doing, he simply says “bahut din ke baad, ek gore ko dekh raha hoon tiranga uncha karte” (after many days, I’m watching a foreigner pull up the Indian tricolour), or something to that effect. If I remember correctly, that dialogue alone got a 2 minute ovation. I also really liked the realistic scenes in the beginning, where the myriad news channels gracing the TV screens are shown for what they really are (especially in India) - rumour mongering, pompous, self-praising garbage.

Its pure adrenalin, this one. Best to watch it with a triclour draped around you, face paint applied liberally, and preferably in a group. Its flag waving, fist pumping, jingoistic, in-your-face patriotism, losing no opportunity to blow a raspberry at our opponents kind of stuff. This is the ‘you don’t win a silver, you lose a gold medal’ territory. And it was great to watch all the kids in the audience get excited, go ‘Yessss’ whenever India scored a goal. We need something like this to make sure our next generation is more assertive. We, Indians, are normally quiet people, accustomed to 'taking it' since the days of Gandhi. If this movie is a reflection of the mood of the nation, then we’re changing. Its time to give it back – and with interest.

Gandhi, My Father

I didn’t get it. Why would anyone want to see a film about a guy who was a failure in almost every facet of life ? He failed in the metric exam thrice, wanted to become a barrister but obviously didn’t have the brains for it, he tried starting a business (twice), failed both times, defrauding his business partners, employer and innocent investors. He changed his religion once, flirted with another before switching back to Hinduism. He spent his last few years as a constantly drunk homeless beggar, who resisted every attempt his father made to reach out to him. Sounds boring, depressing, right ? The movie is no different. Just because the above person happens to be Gandhi’s son doesn’t change anything.

One of the interesting things was watching Gandhiji trying to deal with this issue – imagine you’re the father of the nation, trying to come up with a way to bring down apartheid in SA or the British rule in India – and suddenly you have to find time to deal with a rebellious, indecisive son who obviously is not in the same league as himself. Not easy, and based on the movie I didn’t feel we are able to truly take sides or decide who was in the right or wrong.

Acting was ok throughout, direction / camerawork was good. However we were stuck with a film that lacked appeal or a story that failed to provoke.

Every family has its own black sheep – in this case, a sheep which refused to change colour or fade into the background. However, that doesn’t necessarily mean that it makes for a good movie – for most of the movie you’re squirming, wondering what idiocy Harilal Gandhi is going to do next. I remember, just a month or so before my son was born, my wife asked me what would I do if he turned out to be an inactive, passive, dunce ? it’s a terrible thought – am thankful to God this never happened – but watching this movie was a bit like watching your worst nightmare come true. I don’t think that could be enjoyable viewing for anyone.

Cash

There was an old man from Peru,
Who dreamt he was eating his shoe.
He awoke in the middle of the night,
In a state of terrible fright,
And found it was perfectly true !

I walked in with a lot of trepidation, thinking it was going to be a movie which was desperately trying to be cool, a kind of B-grade rip-off of Dhoom2, a film more about the marketing / hype than substance. And, like the old man in the limerick above, I found it was perfectly true !

It’s set in Cape Town (a stunningly gorgeous city), it casts people who are lesser stars (and less talented) vs D2, has slick action sequences, too many characters, but crucially, no story. None at all. Also, in another desperate attempt to appeal to the young, they’ve tried to incorporate animation sequences in the middle of the action shots – I failed to understand why ? Usually its used when real shots would be impossible to execute – but that’s definitely not the case here as the two (real-life and animation) are interspersed. There are a few funny moments (the whole Ajay Devgan / yatch scene springs to mind), but for most of the while you don’t really get whats happening / there are too many silly sequences / unrealistic things shown and the whole film comes across as very disjointed.

I thought Ajay Devgan wasn’t bad – he has this lazy style which really suits his role here. Dia Mirza also can probably walk out feeling ok and maybe Shamita too. Everyone else will have to really question what they were upto. One of the few things that made me watch the movie was that it was directed by Anubhav Sinha, the guy who gave us Dus (nice, slick, kind of Bad Boys mixed with Usual Suspects, with really nice music). Based on this movie now, he may have trouble finding takers for his next project. I wish he had focused on a fewer characters / relationships, and probably having a plot / story would have helped too !

Partner

I’m sure there are those who feel this was a good movie – great time-pass – but I felt it was terrible. Partly because of its over-reliance on slapstick and on actors (Salman & Govinda) who are incapable of anything else (imagine someone like Akshay Kumar in either of the main roles and you may understand what I mean). And more because, with a little more thought and care, it could have been fantastic.

The characters are shallow, uni-dimensional and flawed. The plot stretches our imagination, credibility and patience and is full of unnecessary characters (like chotta don, or Lara Dutta’s son or Puneet Issar’s character or even Katrina’s father). These guys needn’t have been there – the movie would have been simpler, more focused without them.

Govinda is no longer the same – there are splashes of humour, but its drowned in too many forced moments. The spontaneity from his ‘Ankhein’ days is sadly missing and his face / body reflects his passing years. Salman is his usual self – great if you’re a fan, terrible if you’re not - again not losing any opportunity to showcase his pectorals. Katrina and Lara Dutta actually don’t do that badly – both look good, act well but are constrained by their weak characters.

If you’ve seen Hitch (good film despite its filmi ending), you’ll weep through the movie as I did, wondering what could have been…

Mr and Mrs Iyer

Religion is probably the most abused phenomenon in India today. What should be a personal and spiritual experience is instead used to cloak personal prejudices, hatred, ‘a might is right’/ ‘mob rule’ kind of approach and an easy way to inflame people to do unspeakable atrocities.

Mr & Mrs Iyer, Aparna Sen's 2002 release, showcases an interesting story of a growing friendship between two diametrically opposite people amidst the all too familiar carnage of communal frenzy and bigoted prejudices. Its another provocative film, and I’m enjoying watching them at home on DVD, enjoying pondering over the questions they raise.

Meenakshi Iyer (Konkona Sen Sharma) is an orthodox, Tamil woman, married, traveling on her own (with her one year old son) by bus to Jalpaiguri to catch a train to Calcutta, where her husband awaits her. Raja (Rahul Bose), a Bengali photographer, who is also on the same bus, turns out to be a friend of a friend of her father's and is asked to take care of her / help her through the travel. Their bus is forced to stop midway (along with several trucks) when communal riots flare up nearby. A hindu mob visits their bus as well, looking for muslims to butcher. To save Raja, who is a muslim, Meenakshi pretends he is Mr Iyer. The rest of the story revolves around how they and the different passengers fend for themselves, how they try and find ways to return home.

The whole bus journey, prior to the mob coming in, lasts about 30 minutes and is a fascinating study of how different people pass their time. It is so real, so normal that its almost boring until you realize you’re smiling as you observe the individual foibles and character traits of the different passengers.

Meenakshi is as pure a Tam Brahm as you get – vegetarian, unwilling to eat something cooked by a stranger as you never know what caste he may be, living a secluded / dull homemaker existence, wrapped up in her cocoon which includes her one year old son, Santhanam. Raja, is the photographer who travels to exotic places, lives life on the fly, a complete cosmopolitan. When he tells Meenakshi he is a muslim, she is taken aback and replies ‘I thought you were a Bengali’. He looks at her quizzically and replies ‘Yes, I am but I also happen to be a muslim’ with body language saying ‘whats the problem here’.

Konkona Sen Sharma is outstanding in the movie – it’s a virtuoso performance in her mom's movie, where she behaves like a true Tam (the body language, the intonations are amazingly real). Proof of her great performance is that we were constantly reminded of our very good friends who are also Tam Brahms. Rahul Bose is his typical understated, expressionless self – it suits only certain types of roles and this is one of them. Good performances from the rest of the cast as well and a special mention of the soundtrack – composed by Ustad Zakhir Hussain. Soothing tunes that seem to enhance the madness of the mobs and their artrocities.

I know the partition was a terrible life changing experience for many of us, but the sooner we can put it behind us, the better. The movie is full of remarks like ‘why don’t these muslims go to Pakistan where they belong’ and the sad reality is that a lot of Indians still continue to feel this way. Learning from other cultures suggests that we will not be cleansed of such thoughts till a generation which has not witnessed or been scarred by the event, become the decision makers in the country’s political and socio-economic landscape. I somehow doubt it, I think the older generation has managed to pass on their prejudices very well and its going to take longer till we realize we’re all human beings with a right to practice different faiths / different traditions, to just be different. And the sooner we find a way to make religion less of a badge, less ostentatious and more personal, more private, the better…

Its not easy watching, some sequences are very disturbing and like RDB, I doubt I’ll watch it again. However, the relationship between Mrs Iyer and Raja is beautifully handled (I was reminded of ‘Bridges of Madison County’ a bit) and I’m delighted to have ‘discovered’ this little gem in my DVD collection…